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02 February 2006

'Well,' the old man said, 'well...,' and sank back into his radiance

yay today i bought a new pen! and its the best pen i've ever had! i think i will go back to acts tomorrow and buy ten more, no wait, A THOUSAND MORE!!! i have a steady income and im not afraid to use it! though clearly, i need to learn. i find myself buying things (thankfully, not direly expensive things) just because i can. what am i supposed to do with all this money? what am i possibly doing in the office that is worth all of this money? how could i ever be worth all of this money? i shall smile extra nicely at my boss tomorrow, maybe that will be enough. wait, who am i kidding. i should be smiling all the time! standing on one leg! juggling japanese light catalogues! what do you think we're paying you for, claire? tsk, naive interns.

i almost lost lucy. thank you, papa, for teaching me that "buying a new one" isnt always the solution. thank you, bank account, for teaching me that even if it was the solution, i wouldnt be able to afford it anyway.

today we went back to the art room and ate pizza. i almost cried as i listened to everyone talking. i miss them all so much. i felt so close to them, how could we not be close after all that time together? how could we even bear to be apart? i cant, i wanted to cry on the bus ride home. i wanted to kidnap us all away to that magical place where we sit in container classrooms all day talking, drawing and eating. well, it might be a bit hard to kidnap myself, but i'm not being realistic here anyway, so haha!

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