"But it's fixed now," he says.

i like to run. not in circles, i hated running in pe with a vengeance. and cross country? forget about it. i was one of those who were slower than mr. goh's grandmother (thankfully, there is safety in numbers for me and my dignity), the ones who peered back to check if mr. tan was looking, and then veered off to weave between the air con vents outside the hall, to freedom, and possibly a game of badminton. the only way i could keep going was to think about my breathing, which links to my lungs and their residual air hidden somewhere like an underground lake, which links to depth and spaces, and my heart underneath the equations, beating. how miraculous.

i like the kind of running where you don't know you're going to run, you don't really mean to start, but the wind is just right and there's a coolness like rain in the air and you have something wonderful to tell your parents so you take off your heels and cup your bag in your arms and come on lets go lets go lets run. i like pretending i am running for my life, and all that it entails, that if i exceed a certain speed i will break all cobwebs and i will be clean at last. you can't catch me, neener neener neener.

i want to write a book! as soon as i type that, i can hear the apprehension and skeptism piling up. but yes, i want to write a book! i dont know what i would write about, the only things i love enough to want to write about feel too much like secrets to want to splay them spread-eagled into easily accessible literature. i like my secrets. perhaps i will take on a pen name, but right now the only one i can think up is Morgan Freeman. what an original start to my writing career (or lack thereof).

hmm, im not really sure why i posted this. what on earth will my friends think? gasp.