those crying potato-things

http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily/03_16_2004.html

This totally beats all brenda's "Oh, it's so gonna hurt when you have a baby!" stories. Yes, I remember the good ol' days when we used to have sleepovers (make that sleepover, i only seem to remember one, the one when I got unbelievable headaches in the middle of the night and had to sneak out of the room full of sleeping bodies so I could cry in the toilet) and no sooner had we sat down and begun talking about girly things when brenda would whip out her arsenal of horror stories about how much giving birth hurts, and how much it smells, and how some unmentionable part of yourself tears (how will i ever go to the bathroom again!) and how in ancient china or tibet or somewhere the kings would only attend the labour of their wives, not their concubines, because it was too smelly blahblah. Brenda's stories have forever defined my image of child bearing, especially the smelly part, so that now I know, when that day comes, I will have my SARS masks a-ready.